zeldathemes
Welcome to a blog based on humor
Sup bitches
HOVER

Hey! My name is Austin. I'm a boy from New York who loves food, butts, and sassing the crap out of people. My best friend Tyler told me I should join, so here I am!

Enjoy that which is my blog!

»

I think my laptop fan is broken.

  #my computer overheats too much    #it shuts off all the time  
{x}

my-name-is-hilarious:

"it’s not gay if it’s in a threeway" one straight man says to another straight man. there is a third straight man waiting in the bedroom. the rule somehow still applies.

Ask me about my body. (¬‿¬)

Hair: What hair color looks best on you and what's your natural color?
Skin: Do you tan easily?
Eyes: What is your favorite show to watch?
Nose: What is your favorite perfume/candle fragrance?
Mouth: Do you want to kiss anyone right now?
Tongue: What was in your last meal?
Windpipe: Do you sing?
Neck: Do you wear necklaces?
Ears: How many piercings do you have (if any)?
Cheeks: Do you blush easily?
Wrists: Have you ever broken a bone?
Hands: Are you an artist/writer?
Fingers: Do you play an instrument?
Heart: Are you in love? If so, does the one you love know?
Lungs: Do you smoke cigarettes?
Chest: Are your maternal/parental instincts strong?
Stomach: Do you feel confident in your body image?
Back: Are you a virgin?
Hips: Do you like to dance?
Thighs: Has anyone ever called you fat or ugly?
Knees: Have you ever cheated on someone?
Ankles: Have you ever been arrested?
Feet: Favorite pair of shoes?
Brain: Anything you want to ask
fappuclno:

boutta take the ride of my life

fappuclno:

boutta take the ride of my life

tyleroakley:

god is so good to us

  #i have those underwear    #and my butt jiggles in them too    #this is hot tho  

highbrowandbeard:

THIS IS MY NEW FAVOURITE LINE

A Simplified Guide To The Sexualities

Homosexual: sexual attraction to houses and other building like structures.
Heterosexual: an undying lust for Macklemore.
Asexual: attraction to any and all things beginning with the letter A.
Pansexual: a desire for pots, pans, and other kitchen utensils.
Polysexual: sexual attraction to polygons.
Bisexual: Attraction to the 9th century Chinese army officer Bi Shiduo.
Demisexual: Never ending love of demi lovato
halaalpussy:

cartoongoblin:

karkat-in-the-tardis:

do u ever just want to punch the world in the face

But it’s not about race, right America?

Lets not ignore the gender element as well

halaalpussy:

cartoongoblin:

karkat-in-the-tardis:

do u ever just want to punch the world in the face

But it’s not about race, right America?

Lets not ignore the gender element as well

It’s very rare for me to sleep in underwear. It’s so rare that Mother Nature is taking pictures of this moment because there is so much lightning going on in New York and not enough rain or thunder to make it a storm.

  #it's like I'm famous    #personal