Welcome to a blog based on humor
Sup bitches

My name is Austin. I'm a simply city prince from New York who enjoys food, hotties, drag queens, hotties, funny things, entertainment, hotties, hotties hotties. I'm a bit of a slut/free thinker, and according to many I have a nice ass. I may be a bitch, and sassy, but I'm also funny and nice.. Or so I tell myself.

I hope you enjoy my blog! :)



I was not fucking ready

  #oh my gosh  


when ur mom says ur having pizza for dinner



fun prank: wake up during open heart surgery and sing don’t go breakin’ my heart to the surgeon



  • Failing a test you studied really hard for
  • Getting replaced in a friendship
  • Getting ignored
  • Having something that you’re looking forward to, get cancelled
  • Having to fight back tears in front of people
  • Finding out that the person you like, likes…



Sexism. Does it still exist?
Many men say no.


Black people protest over other black people getting murdered and they are called animals and hit with tear gas but white people start flipping cars and shit over pumpkins and all they get is “awww how cute they are so rowdy”

  #*deep sigh*    #I'm over it  


when you wear cute underwear nothing bad can happen

  #it feels that way tho  


It’s called fall because everything is falling… leaves, temperature, bank account, gpa, self esteem

My Wedding Speech

Me: I'm in love with this guy ever since i was a teen. he's so handsome and cute. He's so artistic and he does things from the bottom of his heart. He's talented and when im sad or angry he can always cheer me up.
Guests: Awwwwwwwww
Me: But unfortunately I can't marry Zayn Malik so i'm stuck with this little shit